If your intimacy is helping you to grow and become mature then it is positive and good and healthy, wholesome.
Intimacy means that there is no privacy. You don’t carry anything private now, at least with the person you are intimate with, y...ou drop your privacy. You are nude and naked--good, bad, whatsoever you are, you open your heart. And whatever the cost you pay for it; whatever the trouble you go through with it. That brings growth. If you are growing more and becoming an individual, if life is happening more to you, if you are becoming more open, if more beauty is felt in existence, if more poetry is arising in your heart, if more love flows through you, more compassion, if you are becoming more aware, then the relationship is good. Carry on. Then it is not a marriage. Then it is intimacy. Relating means you are always starting, you are always trying to become acquainted. Again and again, you are introducing yourself to each other. You are trying to see the many facets of the other’s personality. You are trying to penetrate deeper and deeper into his realm of inner feelings, into the deep recesses of her being. You are trying to unravel a mystery which cannot be unraveled. That is the joy of love: the exploration of consciousness. And if you relate and don’t reduce it to a relationship, then the other will become a mirror to you. Exploring the other, unawares you will be exploring yourself too. Getting deeper into the other, knowing his feelings, his thoughts, his deeper stirrings, you will be knowing your own deeper stirrings too. Lovers become mirrors to each other, and then love becomes a meditation. Let your woman be your mirror; let your man be your mirror. Look into your partner’s eyes and see your face; move into your partner to know yourself. Then one day the mirror will not be needed then, transcendence happens. In fact, the more you know, the more mysterious the other becomes. Then love is a constant adventure.